It’s my birthday. 28. Here I am.

I feel very still today. Like I’m in looking at my life frozen in a glass jar… sort of analyzing it from the outside. This birthday is less about celebration, and more about reflection. I feel quiet (and if you know me, that is highly unusual). As I undeniably enter my late twenties (twenty seven was still mid-twenties in my mind), I can’t help but reflect on what I’ve accomplished in my life so far, where I am, if I’m happy. And I can’t help but think about this past year; how I grew; how I changed.  Living abroad, being alone a lot, learning new things, dealing with unexpected news, traveling to places outside of my comfort zone, all affected me in ways that I can’t really explain, I can only feel. Twenty seven was quite a year. I felt both lost and found, if that could possibly make any sense.

Imagine this: Imagine if you were working at a job that was considered “impressive”, that you worked really hard to obtain, that was financially very stable and secure, yet only mildly fulfilling and mostly miserable. Imagine if you were given the opportunity to leave it behind you and go off to live in another (beautiful/fascinating) part of the world, comfortably, with a man you adore, and take that time to figure out what you really want to do. …What would you do? I took that time to explore the world (as much as I could) and in doing so, also explored myself.

I have so many ideas. Being back in the States makes it much easier for me to pursue new endeavors. And so… Here we go.

Cheers to 28. It’s going to be a great year. 

Also, I’d like to thank my mom. Mom, I always think of you, but especially on my birthday. It’s as special a day for you as it is for me.  You too, Dad.

xxx

P.S. I am going to celebrate, don’t worry. Jaro is taking me out for a nice dinner, exactly what I want.

P.P.S. Actually, all I really want for my birthday is… a house. More on that fiasco adventure soon.

{image is a quiet moment at our apartment in Amsterdam}